....Humbly

Oh so humbly I return... It's been so long since I've been on here that I actually forgot what my blog was called! Why all the hiding? Well, to be really honest, it's because I fell off of that no sugar train. And I'm back to tattle on myself.

I'm not going to lie. It was fun while it lasted. But what sugar ends up doing to me is not fun. It finally caught up and I'm an anxious, nervous wreck. THAT is the outward sign of too much sugar in me. I suffer from anxiety because of sugar. It's that whole adrenal fatigue thing! And I need to get back on board that train.

I may be setting myself up for failure though by eliminating ALL sugar. So I'm going to start with no more desserts and treats for a while. I've been reeeeeeaaallllllyyyy obnoxious about the amount of sugar I've eaten. So this time I'm going to keep the fruit and get rid of the cake balls, caramelitas, muffins, Starbucks... the list goes on.

Months ago when I wrote that I love my family more than sugar, I meant it. And now I need to show it. As I learned this past Sunday, a little bit of laziness can be very very dangerous. This was beyond lazy. It was knowing what was right and not doing it. That is the most dangerous of all. And then mix that with laziness and selfishness and procrastination... you end up with an overload of sugar and anxiety and someone who didn't do what they said they would. Disgusting.

So, I'm sort of slinking back in here, embarrassed. Ready to try this again. Needing to live out what I know to be true. Physically, nutrionally, and spiritually. God made all of me, and I'm all His. I better start behaving that way and not just picking and choosing what parts of me He can have.

I love my family more than sugar...

Starting one week from today, I am going for it. I'm going completely sugar free for three months. At least that is my plan. Who thinks I'm crazy, raise your hand.... I see some hands. Who wants to join me!?!? Do I see just one hand??

Why? Why am I going to torture myself like this? Because I need to. I have a couple of really tired adrenal glands. Adrenal Fatigue. I'm not just making it up, I was tested a while ago. I'm just now taking it serious. I've done some research and I've found that sugar is a main contributor to this problem. Why am I waiting until next week? I wasn't prepared to do this and I'm not that strong yet. I have to mentally prepare, and "grocerially" prepare.

So, no processed foods at all. I will be eating meat, eggs, nuts, some veggies, and a granny smith apple with almond butter once a day for a snack. I have to eat protein every two hours. And I'm taking a vitamin b12 supplement once a day and L-Theanine once every 4 hours. The L-Theanine is a free-form amino acid found in Green Tea. It will help teach my body to calm the heck down. To not react to every little thing like it's the end of the world. And the b12 is for energy. I'll be going to bed early, drinking LOTS of water, and trying to just hang loose and have fun. I'm not gonna lie, this is going to be the hardest thing I've ever done. Including the just hanging loose. I don't hang loose. I nervously flit around. Ask anyone who's ever come to "hang out". Do I sit down? EVER? At the end of the three months, we'll see were I'm at in healing these adrenals and go from there.

You maybe wondering at this point, what do symptoms of adrenal fatigue look like. There is a LONG list, but here are some that I have:

*Fatigue
*Waking up not feeling rested
*Craving sugar (whimper whimper)
*Sensitivity to light, sound, touch, movement
*Irritability and impatience
*and many more but this list is already long enough...

Here is a link to one of the bizillion articles that I've found. http://selfadjustingtechnique.com/30-symptoms-of-adrenal-fatigue/

What are your adrenal glands? They are two small glands that sit on top of the kidney's and they produce different hormones. When we eat sugar our bodies release insulin. Too much sugar means too much insulin. Too much insulin means low blood sugar. When our blood sugar drops our adrenal glands release cortisol. It gives you a boost of energy. The problem with sugar is that we consume SO much of it, that our bodies are pumping out WAY too much insulin and our blood sugar is then constantly too low. Therefore our adrenal glands are working over time to produce cortisol and eventually are fatigued. Alongside of them being fatigued, they are working so hard to produce that cortisol they end up neglecting their other jobs. Which are other producing other hormones that we need!

We end up, like myself, in a constant state of fight or flight or just plain exhaustion. There is no in between for me. I am either AARRHGHGHGHGHH!!!! Or I'm zzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZzzzzzz. The smallest of things can cause me to flip out. The dogs nails as they walk across the floor will make me look like Donald Duck having his worst fit. That is not normal. My kids coming up to hug me or hang on my leg, I look like Bruce Lee trying to defend myself because I just cannot be touched. That is not normal, nor is it fair to my family.

And there is more to worry about besides all of these little weird things about me that sort of get in the way of "life". Leaving these poor adrenals in the condition that they are in can and most likely will lead to disease later on. I love my sugar. I do. But it's just not worth it. I love my family more than sugar. I will be repeating this phrase by the hour the next three months.. and probably longer. I love my family more than sugar.

I love my family more than sugar......

The rest of the story....

So, there is another reason that I am so driven to know all that I can about food allergies and what their effects can be on a life.

Meet my little sis, Tracey.

Her whole life Tracey has dealt with "allergies", and I'm talking sinus infections, tonsillitis, swollen glands. She had troubles as a little girl with breathing at certain times. (At the time thought of as a mild case of asthma.) She had other intestinal and digestive issues that she dealt with as a little girl. Not knowing that those things were not normal to feel, she went on about her merry way. No one knew her tummy hurt. And hey, kids get sore throats. Kids get ear infections. That's normal, right? We now know that those are warning signs. That is not how God created our bodies to feel. He gives us signs like that so we know to do something. Not just throw an antibiotic at it.

Fast forward to about 10 years ago. I could be off by a year or two in either direction. She started having a hard time swallowing when eating. Her glands were always swollen. To the point of her not being able to sing anymore. She would avoid going out to eat because of not being able to swallow her food. She would go the doctor and they would say that she had tonsillitis and that is where the antibiotics started. She was on antibiotics for 10 yrs. Almost with no break. If there was a break in there, it wasn't long. Maybe a few months before she needed them again. She also had sinus infections at the same time as this. Doctors didn't have answers, they just kept giving her meds. She ended up having her wisdom teeth pulled. Hoping that they were the cause of the sinus troubles. Then she had her tonsils taken out. Still, no better. Then the sinus surgery. Still, no better.

During these years, we would suggest that she get her thyroid checked out. Shawn had some clients that had an autoimmune disease called Hashimoto's. It's a disease that attacks your thyroid, causing it to go from hyper to hypo. VERY difficult to diagnose. But she had all of the symptoms. Anxiety, swollen glands, not being able to swallow, forgetfulness, clouded thinking. The list goes on and on. And from the outside, we could see that she had almost EVERY single symptom. (she may still disagree, but that's ok, b/c this is MY blog ;) ) She would give in, and ask doctor after doctor to test her. They would tell her that these things were in her head. She was literally called a hypochondriac by doctors AND friends. She started to believe it herself. And was depressed that this is just how she was. It's how God made her. No doctor would help her, or believe her. Which, let me say this, is a common problem in the life of a person with Hashimoto's.

Finally, about two years ago, my sis was SO sick with this that she was forced to move back home with my parents. She literally could not function. Her anxiety and panic attacks were so bad, one of them left my dad in tears. She was having blurry vision, couldn't remember what she ate 5 minutes ago. The symptoms were just awful. She finally, by God's grace, was able to get in with one of the best endocrinologist in the country. And he diagnosed her with Hashimoto's disease.

You'd think that was a happy day. To finally have someone to help her. I remember, I was SO angry. So angry that it took TEN YEARS for someone to finally help her. I was SOO angry for all of those who did not believe her. Thought she just "liked being sick", or "wanted the attention". That still hurts to think of the people who accused her of that.

She finally got the help she needed. But the problems didn't stop there. She just wasn't feeling better. She still had the sinus problems. Infection after infection. Antibiotic after antibiotic. What is causing this? What can she and should she be doing differently? We knew, and she knew, that antibiotics were not helping her, but hurting her. But she felt she had no other choice.

We then learned about Candida. Candida is an overgrowth of yeast and it feeds on sugar. Candida left untreated can cause all sorts of infections and other diseases. She cut ALL sugar out of her diet. She did not cheat ONE time in 10 months! She ate meat, some veggies, nuts and eggs. She could have coconut oil and olive oil. And a granny smith apple once a day b/c it basically has no sugar. I've been dessert free for one week, and let me tell you, she is my new hero. I don't know how she went completely sugar and carb free for 10 months.

In this time she went to see our friend, Barbara Griffin. She is a naturopath and bio meridian specialist. Barbara tested Tracey for food allergies and tested all of her organs to see what state they were in. She was able to help her know what she can not eat and what she needs to eat.

Here's the point to the whole LONG post... Food allergies, left unchecked can cause disease. ALL kinds of disease, including autoimmune and CANCER.

Tracey is allergic to gluten and dairy and spent a life time eating them. My grandpa died of colon cancer, could that have been prevented?

Friends, you need to know what you are putting into you bodies and whether it is hurting or helping you. Especially as parents!! I'm in no way, shape or form blaming my parents for my sister health. It was a different time. We didn't have the internet to be able to research. I'm sure some people did know these things. But this thing called the World Wide Web has freed us to be able to research and learn and make decisions on our own.

Let's be responsible with these bodies that God has given us. Let's be responsible with these children that God has given us. Don't just go through life blindly shoving food into your mouths. Listen to your body. It may be showing you, with big red flags, that something is not right. Don't choose ignorance, it could cost you your life.

Let's start at the very begining...

A very good place to start. (how many of you are going to be singing The Sound of Music now?)

How did we get where we are now. I'm speaking health wise, allergy wise. What I'm about to share with you, some of you may not agree with. You may have very strong feelings against. And that's ok. Because that means that I don't agree with you, and that's ok too. I still like you :)

So, what got us started down this road? Vaccinations. Or in our case, choosing not to do them. You read it right. We do not vaccinate. Evie is vaccinated up to three years old. And then Lolly was born and the vaccines stopped. Some of you already know this. Some are not surprised to learn this. Some are shocked. Well, let me tell you how this came about.

I'm going to start by saying that this post is not going to be about trying to get you to see things our way. Neither is this blog. But if I'm going to share the things we've learned, I need to be honest about how we got here.

Lolly was two months old, and ready for her first round of vaccines.Evie, baby Lolly and I were in the car on the way to her doctor appointment. We didn't get to the end of the street and I was overwhelmed with a feeling of distress. In my usual fashion, I tried to figure out what the heck was wrong with me!

"Is it because I'm nervous about Lolly getting her shots? No, I'm not nervous. This is my second baby, I've done this before. Is it b/c we're running late? No, I'm always late. What IS it? The feeling is getting stronger. What is it God? What is wrong with me? (Because, after all, He does know.) What is this about? IS it because of vaccines? Should she not get them today? She does have a lot eczema, I know she has some sort of allergy to dairy for sure. Maybe her little system just isn't ready for this. Is that it God?"

As soon as I asked that I had overwhelming peace. But, being me, I had to go back..

"I can't not vaccinate her! It's dangerous! She could get sick and DIE."

That horrible feeling was back. Stronger. More desperate.

"I can't vaccinate her today. I don't know why, but I can't."

Feeling of peace.

"It's decided, today we are not vaccinating. She can go one time with out vaccinating."

We went to our appointment. Our doctor was fine with that. Said that we could hold off. I went home and started to research. I didn't like at all what I read. At that point choosing not to vaccinate was scary, but morally, I just could not do it. I never knew that some of the vaccines were harvested from aborted fetal tissue. I'm just not "cool" with that. But our decision to not vaccinate actually saved Lolly's little life. You see, she is deathly allergic to MANY of the ingredients in vaccines. Eggs being one of them. I can say, without a doubt, that she would not be here today had I vaccinated her. IF she did survive the shots, she would not be our little Lolly that we know. We've gone on to learn much more about vaccinations and we stand strongly by our choices, morally and medically. That's all I will say about them. I may pass on info that I find as I blog. But I will not try to make you see it "my" way.

When Lolly was about 10 months old, Evie gave her a peanut butter lid. Her fingers swelled up to the size of little hot dogs. We knew then that she had a nut allergy. Next was eggs and dairy. She would get sick immediately. Then came fish and many more. We knew all of her allergies by personal experience. We still hadn't had her tested at that point. But when she was two years old, she got a hold of a nut. She threw up instantly, turned all red. She was slobbering and coughing. You couldn't see a white spot on her eye. We didn't know what to do. Never even thought about 911. She was barely speaking then, she said a few words at most. Through all of her coughing and choking she said "Pink medicine mommy." She had never had an antihistamine, she was too young. But I said to Shawn, should we give her Benedyrl? What color was that Benedryl? Oh, pink.

God has saved her life many times, and that was one of them. She has an epi pen now for her allergies. And do you know what, I wouldn't change a thing about her. Not one single allergy. I don't like that she is in danger, but if it weren't for Lolly's allergies, we wouldn't know the things we now know. God has used her to add years to our lives and other peoples lives. We have food allergies that left unchecked would have ended in disease. I thank my God for her life, and for her firecracker spirit! With out Lolly Sherman, we wouldn't be on this mission....

Here we gooooooo...

So. Here I go. For years now, Shawn has wanted me to blog. Others have also mentioned it. And today Emily gave me that final push. Thanks Em ;)

I titled the blog "Life on a mission...." because I am ALWAYS on a mission. A mission to find a new recipe that can fit into our food allergy ridden family. A mission to be a better mom. A mission to be a better wife. A mission to know my Father even better. A mission to BE ON TIME. I am always on a mission. I wear myself out!

I hope that as I ramble on, you can laugh at me. And I hope that in the things I share that you can further your own knowledge on food allergies and health. If just one person is benefited by the things that I'm learning, the blog will be worth it. I am by NO means a professional or an expert in the area of food allergies or health. But I've learned so much since sweet Lolly was born. So, why not share it along with the stories of Evie, Lolly and Wyatt?

Here we goooooooo......